Holiday dinners can be a mixed bag. We love seeing family, friends and loved ones. At the same time occasionally the dinner table conversation can get a little dicey. So how can we all prepare for that?
Boston 25 News anchor Kerry Kavanaugh took that question to an expert who shared four things you can do to put a stressful conversation on ice.
Associate professor of psychology at Lasell University, Charlotte Frazier Ph.D., says its starts with having a game plan.
“I think that ideally, it’s great to have some conversations prior to that day or prior to the dinner around certain topics that we may not feel comfortable discussing,” Frazier said.
Set boundaries before you gather around the thanksgiving dinner table. But since you can’t control what others might say, prepare how you might respond.
“Maybe even saying it to ourselves or in the mirror, perhaps even practicing with someone else, just so that we are prepared. And in that moment, that hot moment, we are able to articulate without too much emotion,” Frazier said.
Next, she says have a safe conversation shifter.
“I call conversations shifters it can be any sort of neutral topic or perhaps a neutral person that’s at the dinner. And so being prepared with those is always helpful.”
And she says when all else fails, it’s ok to walk away.
Take some deep breaths. Do what you must do to take care of you.
Fraizer says, if possible, end conversations on a positive note. Find some shared humanity and shared experiences to talk about rather than harping on the differences.
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