Youth sports no fun? Some kids call it quits by age 11

Fewer kids are playing organized sports than a decade ago and adults might shoulder much of the blame, according to national surveys, as well as interviews conducted by Boston 25 News.

In its annual State of Play report, the Aspen Institute states that about 38% of kids aged 6 to 12 played team sports on a regular basis in 2018, compared to 45% in 2008.  The average child spends less than three years playing a sport, quitting by the time they're 11 years old, the non-profit said.

"The number one reason kids leave youth sports is they're not having fun," said Chris Fay, partnership manager and trainer with the New England Chapter of the Positive Coaching Alliance, a separate non-profit that emphasizes more than just the physical aspects of youth sports.

“One year they’re saying, ‘Do I get to play baseball?’ and the next year they’re saying, ‘Do I have to play baseball?’" Fay added. “Once that flips it’s really hard to get them back."

Fay said a positive environment in youth sports is not about giving everyone a trophy, rather, it’s about having coaches create an environment that kids want to be in and return to.

Gavin Moser, a two-sport varsity athlete at Wayland High School who plans to play baseball at Brandeis University next year, said positive coaches and supportive parents have helped support his own drive to succeed.

“When a coach yells," Moser said about negative reinforcement on the field, “it’s not very helpful. I already know I messed up. It’s not like I’m oblivious to that."

Parents, too, play a role in the pressure many student-athletes and youth athletes are facing.

Fay referenced a survey that asked kids a hypothetical: If you have only two tickets to your championship game, to whom would you give those tickets?

The vast majority of kids chose their grandparents, not their parents, because their grandparents are relentlessly positive and supportive, Fay said.

“But oftentimes immediately after the game, what is the first question we ask?" said Fay, referencing even the most well-intended parents. "Why did you do this on the field? Why didn’t you back that play up?  Why did you throw it there?’ Studies have shown that when we get in the car, kids want to hear one thing from us: ‘I loved watching you play today.’ That’s it."

The mounting pressure in youth sports has become such a widespread concern that more than 50 parents gathered this fall for a summit on the topic at Blake Middle School in Medfield.

Highly successful athletes, like two-time World Cup champion Kristine Lilly, as well as experienced physical therapists alike, issued parents this advice: Consider limiting how many sports a child plays per season to avoid injury and burnout; realize that playing a sport year-round or for a more expensive program does not always lead to more success or enjoyment; and to talk to your children about what they want and what their goals are for their experience.

“[Youth sports are] just a different beast from when I grew up," said Lilly, who's also an Olympic soccer champion.

“We just need to take a breath and remember that they’re kids."

>> MORE: High School Participation Surveys

Cox Media Group